O my soul, come, praise the Eternal
with all that is in me—body, emotions, mind, and will—every part of who I am—
praise His holy name.
O my soul, come, praise the Eternal;
sing a song from a grateful heart;
sing and never forget all the good He has done.
Despite all your many offenses, He forgives and releases you.
More than any doctor, He heals your diseases.
He reaches deep into the pit to deliver you from death.
He crowns you with unfailing love and compassion like a king.
When your soul is famished and withering,
He fills you with good and beautiful things, satisfying you as long as you live.
He makes you strong like an eagle, restoring your youth.
When people are crushed, wronged, enslaved, raped, murdered,
the Eternal is just;
He makes the wrongs right…..Psalm 103:1-6 Voice
So, in light of not forgetting His benefits, I would like to share a quick update as much has occurred since my stairway fall in the Fall. As well as a brief update on Don.
Don has been steadily improving in stamina, and his capacity to do work around the home has increased. He keeps up with the yard like a boss! His bouts with dizziness and balance continue but are not as debilitating. He may need some additional PT to help. On the upside, he has had numerous opportunities to engage in something he loves best – teaching and imparting truths from God’s Word. It is so rewarding to see him flow as he has in the past and see the fruit it brings to others. God is so faithful!
As for me, I believe I mentioned this in my last entry how there were many needful decisions and events throughout the summer and even into October where I had to live in my ‘head’ and not give place to my heart, so this is a recap as well as an update. I had difficulty sorting through mom’s things and would procrastinate spending much time at her place. I was blessed to have a getaway from the Friday immediately following Thanksgiving and over that weekend, returning on Monday. It was needful for me, as I had not given myself time to grieve the passing of my mom. The retreat is a large house, underwritten by various individuals and agencies specific to caregivers, and since I fit the profile times 3, I had been placing my name on the waitlist, which is several months to a year long. So, it ‘just so happened’ in the fullness of God’s time, that there was a cancellation for that weekend, and the name of the room was ‘Cynthia’s Chance.’ Hmmmm – there are times when I wonder if I am really hearing from God, but this time when God invited, He really made it crystal clear! While I was at the retreat that weekend, God met me through our many walks and talks together, just He and I, and allowing place and space for crying and watercolor and journaling. As I drove home, I felt ready to tackle her place in earnest. The following day, November 28, 2023, I fell off the last step in our stairway, breaking my foot in 3 places and severely spraining my ankle. So then, besides being off my feet for over a month, I needed to stay at my mom’s apartment since it is a single level. Really, God??
And so, He ministered to my body, soul and spirit as I realized my need to rest in all of those areas. He truly knows best – why do I ever question?
Forget none of His benefits ……
There have been many benefits, some I will try to capture here. Many are still being developed in my heart. Don and I exchanged roles while my ankle/foot has been recovering. Humbling for me, stretching for him. Little did we know how this stretching was also instrumental in strengthening him. How gracious is our God to redeem the challenges we face in life. He creatively uses anything to bring His good purposes forth.
As I mentioned, mom’s apartment had been a place I would avoid being in for long as it represented sad memories of her passing. And yet, over this time it truly has become a sanctuary for me, a place I enjoy being in and feel His presence. Only God does such amazing work!
So, catch up to today. I have been through the stages of healing and PT has been very difficult but very effective. I still have another month but am improving steadily. Who knew a 4 second slip would take 6 months of my life to adjust and heal. We live such a parable, don’t we? Healing, whether physical or otherwise, takes time and intention to seek to see from God’s perspective. It takes both rest and work, but the rewards are to see His graces, His benefits, as He reveals more of Himself and His unsearchable ways.
This week will be the first Mother’s Day and my mom’s birthday without her. The lilies of the valley, her favorite flower, have been in full bloom, reminding me of her favorite fragrance and how I would pick them and bring them inside for her delight. So I still pick them, and am giving them to neighbors who I happen to see outside. Her legacy lives on. It is a challenging month as it is another ‘first’ and feels more weighty than other holidays this past year. Being mother of adult children, being a daughter without a mother present brings on many vulnerable and tender feelings this Mother’s Day.
So, as an added distraction, the surgery for the basal cell under my eye is set for this Friday, May 10. It is fairly extensive since it is such a delicate area right over my tear duct. Maybe shedding tears is not an option for the next several days after surgery. Several years ago, basal cell showed up in the same area, and I had gone prepared for the scheduled surgery that morning. To my delight and his consternation and surprise, the surgeon spent a great deal of time looking for it (picture the very large magnifying glass and bright light over that area), and even called in the dermatologist who originally flagged it – but they couldn’t find it; it was gone! They had no explanation, but of course we know 😉 and I told them many had been praying and I believed God healed it. Oh, that God would do that again! In any event, we would appreciate your prayers.
Thank you again for the many ways you carry us in your prayers and in your hearts. May God make His face shine upon you and give you His shalom – peace and wholeness.
And may you also join in remembering His many benefits to you as well.